Kaitlyn Sparks

HowManyOfMe.com

There are 3 people with my name in the U.S.A.

Reading people's secrets makes me feel not so bad about the one secret i hold every single day. Then again, it makes me want to write mine down on a postcard of my own and send it in knowing that that one dear secret won't be mine anymore but everyone elses too. The only plausible reason why i can't do this is because i'm afriad that when i drop the secret in the mailbox i won't be able to get it back and it will relieve me. Why this scares me i have no idea.

love,
secret in a bottle

last night, at the library, there was this guy. i swear he had to have been in his twenties(late might i add) and he wasn't very good looking. I showed up at the library at about 3:30-pm-ish and sat down at a computer to do some work/browse the web. at around 4:pm-ish he sat down at a computer across from mine. you know, i was sitting there and thinking what the hell he was doing because the computer he sat down at wasn't working and had a sign nicely posted on it that it was "out of order". I ignore him, hoping he'll go away, but he doesn't. At around 4:15 i look up, he is still sitting there staring at me. I ask him what his deal is and he responds by saying:
"i've never seen such a beautiful girl without make-up on." I'm speachless 1, because he may think i'm beautiful, but that is only a thought, i am not beautiful and never have been(okay, i was an adorable baby and toddler but w/e).

There may not be many guys that are actually willing to kidnap and rape a girl in Oak Harbor but i swear we have the creepiest of th creepy!....

Gotta go
Much love
Katie-Cat

Sooooooo, there is this boy.
we have been together for about,
hmm,
a year and about ten and a half months
(it will be two years on june 14th)
i am stoked because it is true that i
LOVE
him and i
WANT
to stay with him for the rest of my life.
(we pretty much have our wedding date set, our kids names picked out and how our lives are going to mesh when we get out of highschool!)

Here's the thing.
i being me,
just have this need to want to screw everything up and ruin everything so i'm not
BORED
anymore.
how fucked up is that?

yes, i know i love him.
yes, i know i want to spend forever with him.
yes, i know i'm going about this the wrong way.
yes, i know it's stupid just to ruin a pretty much two year relationship because i'm bored.
(isn't it?)

I'm not sure.
i know i will never find someone who loves me as much as he does(i've tried)
is he worth throwing away for those petty nights of just been careless?

i need some fucking help and these dandelions aren't doing me any good.
One says i shouldn't break up with the most amazing boy on the planet.
Another says i should.
but then the last one just gives me a fucking half petal and can't decide which way it wants to go!

it's all like some fucked up fairytale where the damsel in distress
(ME!! xD)
can't decide if she wants to just sit in her clocktower and wait for the hero
or
be the hero and kill the dragon trying to fry her hero to a crisp.
(if that metaphor/simile helped at all..)

wait for the hero...=breaking up(cuz he'd be dead without my help)
be the hero...=not break up(because we could be together)

have i ever mentioned for screwed up my mind works and i am???

HELP WANTED AND NEEDED!!!!
Girl In The Clocktower!

...writers block has gone and passed.
thank god.
and amazingly,
it took with it
the horror
of my depressive habits!

LOVES IT!

two hours and Trevor will be here.
YAY
Three Hours After that and i will be at
THE BEACH!
!!PARTYPARTYPARTY!!

ohmigosh, i can't wait!!!!

I hope enough people to show to where it won't be boring.

Hopefuls!:
Darcy
Lillian
Robert
Geoff
Jeff
Adriene

NEED:
Trevor
Carrie
Asia
Yep.

and then anyone else who decides to show(that i like)...

Pizza, water, chips.. go go go! hmmm, maybe my mom will love me and buy me a mocha.. proly not, but i have hopes!

mochamochamocha.

you know, i could so name my dog mocha.

so it's decided:
i will have a
floppy eared bunny named Yoshi,
a shiba inu named bear
and maybe a border collie named Mocha.
Loves it!
lolz!!

Love,
excited little Sparky-kins

How hard is it for people
to understand
that i
DO
try my hardest
and i can only do so well when
i'm arguing with every thought in my head
and biting my tongue from saying what i really want to.

I can only push myself so far
until it seems like too much and i
collapse
in on myself

the sad thing is:
i'm so close
i feel like i'm falling
i want to just lay around
i want to just sleep for a day
and not give a crap
about what people think,
or whether they NEED me.

and that is the problem.

Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

once again
i
am
stuck.

who woulda known that my best subject in school is now my worst?
Okay, second worst.
Still!
i am officially saaad.

but the upside is: i finally got my library visit.
i swear trevor knows me better than ANYONE
i would hope so anyway.

go go boyfriends.
lolz

love.
Dahling

BIRTHDAY EXTRAORDINAIRE

OH MY!
I've MADE it!
Can You believe it?
I can't!
okay, maybe i can.
I love it.
16.
sigh....
chicken fettecinni!(spelling much???)
Favorite food ever!
(aside from cereal)

other than my b-day being amazing so far!(i loooove carrie lolz)
i have a shit amount of homework,
i think im unna fail this qurater in like math and science and i'm hungarrry(lolz, not the country)
is it just me or is Joseph Stalin scary and mean and dead?(okay, there is a definite on the dead part)
and i swear Elvis is ALIVE(wow, if you take out the 'v', what does it spell???: A LIE)
Oh, and dearest regards to Asia(for being the first and only(and proly the last) to comment anything that comes out of these little deviastic fingertips(is deviastic a word? didn't think so)

soooo.
happy
brilliance
to
me
(and birthday of course)

XD

love and brilliance
Spasgasm

ONE DAY!(i'll proly be saying this in june too.)

Tomorrow at exactly 11:04 pm i will be turning sixteen. I can't believe i've finally made it. (Okay, i haven't made it yet, but i'm pretty much there.) I've been dying to be sixteen for the longest time and i knew that if i could make it to sixteen i could make it to twenty and if i can make it to twenty then i can make it for however long i need or however long it takes for fate to take me back to wherever i came from(if you know what i mean). The ironic thing about all of this is: i'm scared out of my mind. I don't know why, but i just am.

This is it for my birthday update.

less than a week!!!

well... Tuesday is almost here and iono, maybe i should be more excited???



Sex On Mind